Now that I am looking at that title again, it makes it sound like I eat and drink drunks. Believe me, I like a good drink and all, but I am not NEAR the type of desperate drunk that would actually EAT someone to obtain their alcohol content. Drinking it from them though...when I was little I wished I was a vampire...this is all making sense to me now...which is scary. Anyhow. Enough rambling.
This weekend was busy. So busy in fact that I can't imagine how it all happened in 2 days time. Saturday, we spent the majority of the day Christmas shopping. And let me tell you, it IS possible to spend widely over your weeks wages in just 1 day. VERY.POSSIBLE. But we are almost done. I think we owe my mom a sweater or something of the sort, but that's it. That and the "cash" that my younger cousin is requesting. Who asks for CASH for Christmas? Whatever.
Saturday evening we met friends and their baby girl for dinner. Dean was in rare form and ohmygod the sheer horror on our friends faces. They kept stealing wide eyed glances from their 6 month old soft, downy, angel in her highchair softly cooing to the demon freak child running in circles around the restaurant, ignoring our every plea TO SIT DOWN RIGHT NOW OR YOU WILL GO IN A HIGHCHAIR. You may not think you can fit a 40 pound toddler into a high chair, but that too is also possible. VERY.POSSIBLE.
The roads were a bit slick on the way home, but not too bad. I have a 4 x 4! Inclement weather be damned! We'd almost made it home when the truck in front of me came to a screeching dead halt in the middle of his left hand turn in downtown Birmingham. DAMN. IT. WTF. WHY DOES EVERY CAR I HAVE BECOME A POS? I quickly get out of the car as does the other driver. We're all ok. I am so sorry I say (why I say that I have no idea, he's the JA that slammed on his breaks on an icy road in the middle of a freakin turn!) And he says the same, claiming that a pedestrian caused him to stop mid turn. I ask if his truck is ok, he GLANCES at it from where we are standing, doesn't even go near it, yep, it's good,you guys all ok? Yeah, we're fine. Ok then. And he jumps back into his truck and leaves. Which is fine by me, because even though he's the JA, the police don't care too much about my opinion of my fellow drivers. They care more about who hit who. And I would be the hitter. I figure he'd probably had a couple and didn't want the cops sniffing around. That or maybe he had a hooker tied up in the back of his cab. Either way.
Sunday, we bust ass to get Dean to his 10:30 hair cut apt at Carnival Cuts only to find that the MF's forgot that the mall opened at 10 during the holidays and that we had a 10:30 apt. No one was there, the gate was down, and all you could see inside were the sad clown faces of haircuts that would not be. Nice. Onward and forward to brunch with Santa and the in-laws. That was nice. Good food, and a great Santa who actually took time with each of the kids and really spoke to them. I guess that's what you get when you venture out past the peed on mall Santa.
Next, our Christmas tree. This is were we actually cost compared trees and shopped around because the lots in our area are so freakin ridiculously priced. $65 for a tree. And that was a bargain. But it's that or drive an hour and a half to where the trees are birthed and raised in their natural habitat. A nice idea, probably steeped full of Christmas cheer, family tradition and a joyful sleigh ride or some damn shit. Frankly, I just don't have the time.
